Bald is beautiful...

Before breast cancer I had thick, long hair, it was a huge part of my identity. I colored it monthly and loved being able to change up the cut and color based on the seasons, or even just my mood. My Oncologist told me that I would start losing my hair by the third week of chemo, I dreaded not having my long locks, but I was fine with the free bikini & leg wax (because you do lose all of your hair). I decided to take control of the situation, and I started by cutting about twelve inches off of my hair, it had been years since my hair had been that short. By my second week of chemo my hair was starting to fall out by the handfuls, I knew it was time to do something drastic.

I messaged a friend, who’s also a stylist, and she offered to shave my head for me. I took her up on her offer, I was not going to let the cancer control me. I went to Brielle’s, and I sat outside, and she shaved my head, I joked that the birds were going to have some nice fluff for their nests. I thought I would be sad, but I did not shed a tear. Instead, I felt empowered by my decision to shave my head, I was in charge not my cancer. Thankfully I do love wearing hats and scarves, and I have a huge collection now. Wigs just are not my thing, they make me hot and itchy, and I’m proud of my bald head, I’ve gone through hell to have it.

I have now also lost my eyebrows and eyelashes; this has been a little harder for me to deal with. But I do still love the fact that I don’t have to shave. I’ve let go of conventional ideas of beauty and it’s been so freeing. In the past I wouldn’t leave the house without doing my makeup and hair. Now I seldom wear any makeup and I am not the least bit self-conscious. I’ve earned new scars, and I have more yet to come, and they are beautiful. Together my baldness and scars are the proof of how hard I’ve fought against this invasive disease. But I am grateful for the lessons I’ve learned, beauty is in our spirit and our soul, so let yours shine!